Religion is one of the most important things in many people's lives. They turn to it when they are feeling helpless and they praise it when their lives are going well. It often determines morals and can be a determining factor in a relationship. Hours a week are spent on it, both with others and in studying the text.
So, why doesn't anyone discuss it?
I disagree with the generally accepted "rule" that you shouldn't discuss religion or politics. I understand that they can be very touchy subjects and I do think that you shouldn't tell someone that their view is wrong or that they should change, but I also believe that openly discussing religion (or politics for that matter) will help you understand yourself and the other person.
My friend Jay has always been very Christian; I, as has been made clear by now, have not. The other day when I told him I'd become Baha'i, he questioned me about the Faith and asked that I explain it. He took a genuine interest in it and wanted to understand, which I think shows maturity. Because of his upbringing, Jay could have just blown off my comment and chosen to just "not go there." Instead, we ended up having a 2-hour-long discussion of religion that ended in a decision to study the holy books of the world in an effort to understand them and go beyond the general knowledge and misconceptions people have. In our discussion, Islam came up a lot. This isn't surprising because people have so many misconceptions about it and it can be viewed as a taboo, almost, in our society. Because of my love of the Middle East, I have always been a fierce defender of Islam against those who attack it mindlessly. However, I concede that I don't know as much about it as I wish I did.
So, we decided to start with the Quran. Monday, we met and had a quick dinner before going to Barnes and Noble to buy and read the Quran. You get odd looks when you ask the assistant at the store if she can order another Quran. (They had more than one, but never multiples of any version and we wanted the exact same translation and notes.) This shows the stigma that is so prevalent in our society. Honestly, I didn't notice her judgment that much because I am so used to that because of my unusual interests (you also get odd looks when you tell people that you want to move to the Middle East), but I could tell that it bothered Jay and I think that helped him understand exactly why it is so important for us to do this.
So we spent 2 1/2 hours at Barnes and Noble just going through the first half of the introduction. We probably only read 10-12 pages, but there was so much information that we really wanted to take time to understand it all. We stopped to discuss often and one thought would lead to another that would relate to Christianity or the Baha'i Faith. It was a very productive discussion in my opinion. At this point (10pm), B&N closed and we moved to a bench outside to finish our discussion. We ended up talking for another whole hour about our personal views, our experiences with religion and friends, and the touchy subject of religion and homosexuality. The last is something we both have trouble coming to terms with because it is so hard to separate the social and political with the religious. I think I'm going to do another post focusing solely on this later, but for now let me just say that we both struggle with the issue of what is right.
During our Skype conversation, there was a lot of disagreement between Jay and I. I think he was a little too defensive and I was a little too pushy, so we had more disagreement than was probably necessary. But it's important to point out that it was never disrespectful and I don't think either of us left the conversation feeling unhappy or attacked. Rather, we thought it important to take more time to understand each other's views and the views of others around the world. Monday night, we had a lot more agreement. Jay and I see eye-to-eye on the majority of things, but take different paths to get to our conclusion; we articulate our views differently. This proved especially helpful because when you have to take time to wrap your head around exactly what the other person is saying, you also have to take time to express yourself more clearly. This helps you understand exactly why you believe what you believe and it also helps you see different angles and appreciate the other person.
I'm really looking forward to finishing the rest of the introduction with Jay on Thursday and actually beginning our reading from there. Hopefully we will go beyond the Quran and eventually read all the holy books. This summer, we'll probably only be able to do the Quran but we both are committed to reading the others and discussing via Skype when school starts back. This will be harder, especially with both of us having busy schedules, but I think it is important. Next I think we are going to read the Bible. I have read a lot of the Bible and know a lot about it purely from growing up where I did. Jay has read more of the Bible than me, but said he'd never read it all the way through. It won't be for a while, but I think when we do, we will draw a lot of parallels to what was said in the Quran. In fact, when we start reading the Quran, I think we will begin already to see parallels there; we already have from just reading the introduction.
I think this is a good way to bring unity, one of the fundamentals of the Baha'i Faith. Simply by exposing yourself to something that is foreign gives you a new appreciation for it and helps you see that it's really not all that different from you. This is something I've always wanted to do and I'm so pleased that Jay and I are taking this step together.
Wish us luck.
Note: I've also started reading the Kitab-i-Aqdas all the way through on my own. I've read a lot of different Baha'i writings but, just as Jay with the Bible, have never taken time to read them all the way through. So, this is a good thing for me too.
And, of course, a quote will end this post. It talks of race, but I think it very clearly also applies to religion or any kind of divide for that matter. It's a little long, but really lovely:
"If you desire with all your heart, friendship with every race on earth, your thought, spiritual and positive, will spread; it will become the desire of others, growing stronger and stronger, until it reaches the minds of all men. Do not despair! Work steadily. Sincerity and love will conquer hate. How many seemingly impossible events are coming to pass in these days! Set your faces steadily towards the Light of the World. Show love to all; 'Love is the breath of the Holy Spirit in the heart of Man'. Take courage! God never forsakes His children who strive and work and pray! Let your hearts be filled with the strenuous desire that tranquillity and harmony may encircle all this warring world. So will success crown your efforts, and with the universal brotherhood will come the Kingdom of God in peace and goodwill." (Abdu'l-Baha, Paris Talks, p. 29)
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